Tuesday, September 18, 2012

Sharing the Love

Kids change pretty much everything about your life. It's inevitable, it's unavoidable, and it's wonderful. Having that first baby is magical.

But, along with that, is the fear in the back of your mind before the baby comes of, "How is this going to affect our marriage? Will everything be harder? How will we cope with the added stress?"

And then baby comes and somehow it works. You don't love your spouse any less - your love for him or her isn't diminished because there's another person in your family to love. If anything, it's enhanced because you get to watch him transform into a parent - and that's magical, too.

Despite having gone through that family transformation with Asher, my husband and I were still nervous about how things we would change when our second little baby came. Keep in mind that Asher was only about 9 months old when we found out I was pregnant. You can probably imagine how we were feeling: how was our little, little guy going to become a big brother in just a few short months? He'd only be 16 1/2 months old by that time!

So yes, we had our concerns. And part of me was wondering how we would split our love, time, and attention between two very little boys. Asher was always my little sweetheart - he was pretty attached to me from the very beginning. And, with me being a stay-at-home-mom, he had a lot of one-on-one mommy-time (poor guy!). He was definitely spoiled in that regard, and when Dusty and I went to the hospital for me to be induced with Aiden, that was the first time I had spent the night apart from him.

Then little Aiden was born, and all of those fears and concerns vanished. It was needless worry on our part. Again, we didn't love Asher any less than we had, but we loved Aiden just as much. As parents, you don't split your love between your kids, or between your kids and your spouse; that love simply increases. Just when you think you couldn't possibly love any more than you already do, you can. And it's simple.

It makes it so much easier to understand God's love for us, and how we are created in His image. It's no difficult matter as a parent to love each of your children more than you ever thought possible, just as God, our Father, loves each and every one of His children equally and unconditionally.

So, now that we have baby #3 on the way, I have no qualms about how we'll manage to "share the love." It starts before they're even born, and continues to grow, and grow, and grow . . .

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